Monday, October 5, 2009

sea shells

Katelyn and I went to the beach a few times over the summer. My parents have a house at Bethany Beach, DE, and we would go there during the week while Adam worked. Each time we were there I became obsessed with collecting sea shells for Andrews special place. I suppose it was one way for me have Andrew at the beach with me. When we'd go to collect shells, that was me spending time with both of my children. I now carry a bag of shells in my car.



Each visit with Andrew we spend time going through the bag and carefully decide which ones we will leave. Katelyn then carefully goes through the ones that are already there and she picks one or two to take back home with her. I like to think that my kids would share this nicely if Andrew were here. My guess is probably not.

again

It happened today again. It comes in different versions, usually when I'm in the dumps already. "How many kids do you have?" Today it came as "Is she your only one?"

I was at the park watching Katelyn play with a little boy about 12 months old...in the wobble as he walks stage. I love and hate watching her play with little boys. I know she would / will be a great big sister. She needs a sibling around, that's for sure. So, as I was feeling sorry for myself and for Katelyn the mother asks "is she your only one?" As much as I didn't feel like chatting at that moment in time, I can never not mention Andrew. To say I only have one child is to answer as if Andrew never existed. I simple can't do that. So I told her. I'm sure I ruined the 'chatting with a stranger in the park mood', but it helped my mood.

It made me feel better to know that one more person knows about my son.

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