Some days I'm sad because I'm trying to learn how to keep Andrew a part of our lives. I focus on how to include him and how to be his mother with him in Heaven and me here.
And other days, like today, I am sad because I think about those first few days in July. I look at pictures from the hospital and remember so many of the emotions. I think I was mainly numb. Shocked. Still trying to process everything going on. I look at the pictures from my dads camera. They aren't the edited ones from NILMDTS that are so beautiful and soft. They more like the raw, unedited version of a film. But they're good for me to look at, to remember what it was really like.
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